<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>Is this just fantasy? by Winchestersandmarvel</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26630911">Is this just fantasy?</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Winchestersandmarvel/pseuds/Winchestersandmarvel'>Winchestersandmarvel</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Chaotic duo Remus and Virgil [14]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Sanders Sides (Web Series)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Dissociation, Grounding techniques, Mental Health Issues, Panic Attacks, Platonic Cuddling, Platonic Hand Holding, Platonic showering together, Sympathetic Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, Sympathetic Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Sympathetic Dark Sides (Sanders Sides), all the others are mentioned at the end but its not really enough to tag them, depersonalisation, derealisation, for gods sakes virgil and remus are not neurotypical, i guess?, normalise platonic affection my dudes, platonic dukexiety - Freeform, platonic head kisses, stimming? i think?</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 07:34:33</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>927</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26630911</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Winchestersandmarvel/pseuds/Winchestersandmarvel</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Remus experiences derealization, Virgil helps calm him down, and ground him. </p><p>Similar to drift and tether.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Anxiety | Virgil Sanders &amp; Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Chaotic duo Remus and Virgil [14]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1704238</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>194</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Is this just fantasy?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>soooo, I believe derealization is the correct term for what I'm describing, but I may be wrong, so if I am, please correct me. Either way i experienced it the other day and its terrifying. That being said, this is based off my own experiences and if you experience anything like this I highly advise that you speak to some sort of specialist about it, whether that be a doctor, therapist, psychologist. Just look after yourself &lt;3</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Remus, after Janus was accepted, tended to come and go from each side of the mindscape he pleased, like a cat traversing between households. </p><p>It did mean that Virgil and Remus were able to repair their friendship, and it wasn’t too uncommon for the pair to cause havoc together, Remus’s seemingly boundless energy feeding into Virgil and giving the life behind his eyes he lacked before they made up. </p><p>Today though, Remus appeared in Virgil’s room with a wild look in his eyes, breathing heavily. </p><p>For a split second, Virgil was annoyed at the other for the sudden intrusion, but that was quickly overcome with worry as he walked towards the other, worried furrow in his brow. “Cephy? Are you okay? Are you hurt?” </p><p>Remus’s eyes finally locked onto him but Virgil could see they way his eyes focused and unfocused on his form. </p><p>“I-” another sharp inhale for breath, “Is this real?” </p><p>It all clicked in Virgil's mind. This had happened before. A little too much time alone in the imagination and the lines between reality and his creations begin to blur. </p><p>“This is real Rem, Very real.” Remus nodded, reassurance already helping to slow his breath “Can I come closer?” </p><p>Remus nodded once again but flinched once Virgil was in front of him. Virgil stopped immediately, watching as Remus looked around the room, occasionally lingering a little longer on certain objects. </p><p>“The clock is wrong. Clocks don’t work like that. It’s Wrong. Wrong. Fake,” grubby hands came to tug at his hair, dirtying the grey streak to be almost as brown as the rest of his hair. </p><p>“It’s real Re, you helped make me get it to do that remember?” </p><p>There was a slight hesitation but eventually he got a nod, making the other give him a reassuring smile. </p><p>“Let's sit down” he offered, noticing the slight sway in the others legs. Sitting on the carpet cross legged, watching the other do the same, he pressed his hands onto the carpet, before dragging them back and forth “Put your hands on the carpet. That’s real.” </p><p>With the constant reassurance that it’s real, the green clad sides hands lowered from his hair to rub across the carpet, watching the fibres as their shade changed slightly as he changed their position. </p><p>He slowly started to chant his own reassurances “This is real. Real. Carpet’s real, so you’re real.”</p><p>Virgil affirmed his statements, offering a hand when the other affirmed that he’s real “I am real. Look, you can touch me. That means I’m real right?” </p><p>Remus tapped his fingers onto the palm of the outstretched hand, testing it as his breathing finally started to even out. “You’re real… but I’m not”</p><p>“What do you mean Re? You’re real too” </p><p>His head shook viciously for a second “No. No. Not real. Plastic. Plastic hands.” As if to demonstrate his point he began to tap his own fingers together. </p><p>“You’re real Remus. Do you want to know how I know that?” </p><p>Remus’s eyes finally met his, curiosity in his face. Virgil took that as a yes and shucked off his hoodie before draping it over his shoulders. Remus relaxed into the warmth, hands coming to tug it tighter around him. </p><p>“If you weren’t real you wouldn’t feel the warmth, or the weight, would you? That means this is real. You’re real. I’m real. Your brother is real, Janus is real, Logan is real, Patton is real, you and I are real.” </p><p>Remus agreed reluctantly, rocking himself back and forth gently. Virgil offered the hand again, but this time Remus just shuffled a little bit closer before flopping into the others chest. </p><p>Virgil let out a gentle ‘oof’ before wrapping his arms around Creativity’s shoulders, continuing the rocking motion as Remus finally settled. </p><p>After about half an hour, Virgil ducked his head to gently kiss the top of Remus’s head, before whispering to the other “would you like to have a shower? I think it’ll help you feel real. You don’t even have to take your clothes off in the shower, but you can wear my hoodie after.” </p><p>Remus agreed and so they walked slowly to the bathroom, and with Remus’s reluctance to let go of Virgil, showered together. After they got dressed, Remus’ borrowing some of Virgil's clothes, including the patchwork hoodie. Virgil instead wore his old black and grey hoodie. </p><p>They sat in Virgil's bed for a while, listening to music together and reassuring the creative side when they began to doubt reality. </p><p>Remus slowly came back to himself throughout this period, if only just a little less energetic, and eventually decided it was time for a snack.</p><p>Clutching Virgil’s hand tightly the two ventured to the kitchen where the others sat, having a conversation. </p><p>Remus started grabbing snacks, completely ignorant to the glances exchanged between everyone else. When Roman looked as if he were going to say something Virgil glared at him, dragging a thumb across his neck, quickly silencing him. </p><p>Remus began to drag Virgil back to his room, arms filled with various types of gummy sweets, and once they returned to the anxious sides room he began to rip the packets open, making a point to eat the heads off of the sweets first and to stick various parts of the multicoloured animals together to make a disturbing hybrid creature. </p><p>Virgil smiled at his best friend whilst typing out an explanatory text to the others, rather than have them get the wrong impression about them holding hands, dressed in each other's clothes with damp hair.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>thank you so much for reading this little vent fic &lt;3 if you liked it please leave a kudos, and a comment would be so greatly appreciated. Please look after yourself dears &lt;3</p></blockquote></div></div>
</body>
</html>